I've been floating around for quite some time.
And this dark cloud of my blog hangs over my head...
Not as a burden, but as a necessity.
I relish in recounting my experiences abroad. I relive them every time.
But, first, more of a spiritual, diary entry.
What is the most important thing in the world?
Is it living your dream? Is it being successful? Is it being happy? Where do all these things come from? How can you avoid grief, suffering, misery, depression, anxiety, pressure, temptation...?
I watch the series "Girls."
I hate/love it.
I want to punch Marnie in the face. I think Hannah is excessively excessive. I love Charlie--he is conflicted and hurt, but, plays it off like he isn't--the male silent restraint is perfect. Shosh is amazing--because she is real. In real life, her character exists and is just as caring and naiive as she is portrayed. Jessa is that person we all wish we could be--flighty, apathetic, hippy.
But, that's "girls."
We get hurt, we freak out, and don't know what the world is trying to tell us.
What is important to them in the show? Boys, money, a job, school...?
No.
Those are the physical representations of obstacles that pose emotional and internal conflict that we mentally and emotionally negotiate, daily, inorder to be able to wake-up and take on the day.
I've never had that group of "girls"-- four people in the same place at the same time. I love how it is romanticized. I love how it is in NYC. I love how it is a self-referential critique to "Sex and the City." It's an almost-homage as to say, "who they were before they got rich, sexy, and thirty..."
What do they have in "Sex and the City" that they don't in "Girls"...?
Financial stability.
That golden wheel that churns and produces energy, confidence, and profit.
But, is that what they are looking for in the show? Their golden nugget?
Yes. However, I think Lena Dunham wants to refer to control. When you lose control of your life, you feel like everything is falling and there is nothing you can do to stop it. So, you perpetuate your own downfall because you feel bad for yourself. So, you do things and make excuses for what you have done, in the extreme. Such as Marnie, who sings a horrendously embarrassing version of Kanye West's "Stronger" at her ex-boyfriend's work party that she inadvertently invited herself to. When confronted by her ex, Charlie, he tells her she is totally wacked. But, she is quick to defend. She says she is happier then she's ever been and that happy people don't have hard times. She is just kinda waiting...They are ALL just kinda waiting.
This is why I love Lena Dunham.
Unless you have not lived this and are not striving for more or looking for answers in any and all aspects of your life, you miss it.
Which would mean, we all should get what she is eloquently saying without actually having the characters say it.
I have lost control of my life before. Lost perspective... Got my nose pierced...Cut my hair...Believed I was in love...
We can convince ourselves of almost anything when we try hard enough. (Thank God I know Gandalf is real, otherwise, I would believe I was actually him in the flesh).
What I believe is the most important thing in life is knowing who you are and being secure in that. If you know who you are, or have a foundation of who that person is, you always have a landmark to return to. It's very easy to get lost, run off track, and not be able to find your way back.
And the only way to remember who you used to be and still are is to do what you really want--living your dream.
So, I guess it is all a chain, cause/effect thingamajig. If you know who you are and do what you want, then, you will be happy. And if you are happy and positive, good things happen. The universe is balanced...
Just ask science.
The Earth rotates around the Sun while the Moon rotates around the Earth...
The Earth is the only known place with life....
So, live it and take advantage of this privilege we have been given.
Cause you only get one chance.
Be weird...It's way more FUN
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