Monday, November 19, 2012

Adventuring


Querida Abuelita,

Was it like this when you were young? Did you feel invincible? Older than you really were? Ignorant and naiive or aware and conscious? I don't know how I feel about my age or my "youth." Everyone insists on referring to my life here as an adventure... You could say so. But, isn't life in itself an adventure.. Or more of a journey.. Thus far, my journey began with twenty-two years of preparation. During my intensive prep courses of everyday life, the more experiences I had with the abundance of people i have met, I was able to slightly narrow the margin of likes, dislikes, and the unknowns. The best gifts are always decorated in the most unexpected packages...this is what I have learned. When I worked at the hotel, I would meet truckloads of people a day. I was a part of a large corporation funnel system, which causes more people to be overworked in a fixed, toxic environment. The promotions don't make you richer as a human. in fact, you more or less lose your will to participate in society...unless, you consider work a pillar of society. Today, for society to function, your participation in the economic sector is invaluable. But, how this process has changed from a means of survival (to pay for food, clothing, and housing), into a means of identification, I may never understand.

I've always valued my independence. But, it's not always easy. I went to Granada this weekend alone to sleep on someone's couch for three days. I know you are worried...that's why this revelation is admitted now...after the fact. The person I stayed with is fantastic. He experienced a different prep course than I-- having parents that choose to be international with their children leaves an everlasting impression on many of these types of people... At 24, he speaks 3 languages fluently, has lived in Liverpool for a year and France for two years. He has a position in an international company, with which comes the opportunity to meet more people like himself--an empathetic support group of curious seekers. I met two more of his colleagues, one from Poland and one from the united states, both of whom moved here 5 years ago without knowing a lick of Spanish. Qué cojones. Now, they are fluent, have secure positions in a stable enterprise, romantic interests with people of different backgrounds, and spend their weekends going out with each other until 4am...at the earliest. The conversation covers all social arenas--politics, humor, film, languages, beauty...an aberico of the essence of humanity. I really never thought my times here could evolve and flourish so rapidly in such an impressionable way. I explained to the group, after about 3 glasses of wine and 3 gin and tonics (don't worry, over a span of 5 hours) that I am walking on a cloud. Every. Single. Day. Feeling helpless in a language at times and making mistakes is hard for someone who is hypercritical of herself. But, this is why I'm here. I left my comfort zone. I went to a new city...alone... Only with the positive energy and hope that my host would be just as hospitable and friendly as he was. But, I must admit, he was more. The people that are close to me from home know who they are. But, there has always been a separation of friends and family for me. Until now. This individual has a family of friends... They function as a unit, can spend a whole day together, on the weekend, after 5 days at the daily grind together as well, to remind each other of old memories, while constantly making new ones. This person introduced me to his family...without knowing me. He trusted.

Grandma, you have always taught me this--trust in the good in people. I just couldn't see it in the states. Instead, all I saw was the outline of a human wrapped in money and stamped with Louis Vuitton, orange county, Mercedes Benz, or strings of zeroes. But, all that had to occur for this to be so emphatic...so special. I got to write him a note in his travel book for the people he hosts, but I don't feel like that will ever be enough. I hope I get to repay the favor some day and show him half as good of a time as he provided for me...the unconscious willingness to share good with someone.

My journey is never going to change my relationship with you or how much I long for one of your warm hugs, but, this adventure is going to allow me to be a better version of myself. And if this is only the beginning, I must keep smiling and repaying the favor to all of those who have been so welcoming to me.

I love you.



































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